The conclave - Now here's an idea...

As the Kaffliks get together for their meeting in the Sistine Chapel to elect a new head honcho, there is news from the US that the members of the largest Diocese in the States are a bit pissed off that their disgraced cardinal, Roger Mahoney, is planning to attend.

Mahoney was stripped of all administrative duties in January over allegations he engaged in a cover-up to protect priests accused of abuse. He retired after 26 years as the Archbishop of Los Angeles in 2011, following the release of thousands of pages of files which highlighted claims against more than 100 priests dating back decades.

They also showed the attempts made to avoid getting the police involved.

So here's my tip for the conclave when considering a new Pope. Why not stop pissing about covering up all this sex abse stuff and just add it to the Catholic doctrine?

Now on the face of it, this might seem an odd idea that could perhaps be open to criticism, but let's not forget that the Pope is officially infallible - so if they went for it, then it would have to be right, wouldn't it? Perhaps Mahoney could show us the way? After all, would he be much worse than the one we just got rid of?

After all, Catholics readily accept that condoms are evil, and if they’ll believe that rubbish, then I’m sure they’ll believe that committing sexual abuse is a perfectly normal part of being a priest.

On the other hand, perhaps we should point out to God that this would be a great opportunity for another thunderbolt. He could rid the world of the worst hypocritical bastards on the planet in one fell swoop.

Mind you, it would be a shame to ruin that ceiling...although that's possibly the only down side to the idea!