Wednesday, 25 November 2015

What a twat !

My regular reader might have gathered by now that despite not being in any way against the Royal Family, I make an exception for that jug eared twit, Charles.

Not content with being a bloody fool, he has to go and open his mouth and prove it. This week he has given an exclusive interview to Sky News about climate change / global warming. Apparently it's responsible for all the ills in the world, and it's all our own fault!

For example, Charlie reckons that the current situation is Syria is all down to climate change. So that's simple then. It's nothing to do with the uprising of the Arabs across the whole of North Africa being sick and fucking tired of being murdered and robbed by crooked power mad dictators. It's all to do with the weather.

Charlie reckons that the Syrian war has been caused by 5 or 6 years of drought forcing the people to fight over scarcer and scarcer resources. Nothing to do with Assad or the Arab Spring. It's water shortages that's caused it. Thing is, Charlie, Syria is a fucking desert. There's never been a lot of water there.

But never mind all that, because according to ol' jug ears, the migrant crisis is caused by the weather too. Seems it's just too hot down south so they're all coming north. Nowt to do with economic migration or jihadists wanting to murder non believers. It's the weather.

Charlie now says that the Pentagon agrees with him and, apparently, so does Charlotte Church. So he must be right, mustn't he?

Every time this country has had a king called Charles, it's been a total fucking disaster so why the fuck did Lizzy name this twat Charles? Did she know he was going to be mentally defective?

The only hope the monarchy has in this country now is that he dies before his mother, so let's hope she lasts as long as her dear old mum and we can skip a generation because this bloke is definitely going senile...

Tuesday, 24 November 2015

Let's stop pissing about...

The Russians have a plane blown up over Egypt so what do they do?

Well, in the last two days they have taken out 472 ISIS targets in Syria and killed 11 Islamist militants who had been helping to smuggle fighters from the North Caucasus across borders to Syria.

The French are attacked in Paris, so what do they do? They immediately deploy an aircraft carrier and start joint aerial operations with the Russians to blow the shit out of ISIS.

We got attacked in London on 7th July, 2005, so what did we do? Well, not a lot as far as I can see.

The Hungarians sealed their borders to migrants and announced yesterday that all the jihadists currently coming into the west to attack us in our cities are coming through as migrants. So what do we do? Send chartered aircraft to Syria to bring them here quicker.

Over 800 jihadists that came from this country are now fighting with ISIS, so what do we do? Keep the border open so they can get back here to attack us without fear of being caught along the way.

So Cameron says we will develop two rapid response brigades by 2025 to fight the islamist threat. Let's hope we don't get attacked in the next ten years then! On Sky News yesterday Michael Fallon was pressed by Eamon Homes as to when these brigades would be ready. He dodged the answer. As it's ten years, that's hardly surprising.

Corbyn is still sitting on the fence over action in Syria fighting opposition from his own party. And jug eared Charlie is telling us that the situation is all being caused by global warming FFS!

This country is danger of becoming the soft target and the laughing stock of the world at the same time. Let's just hope ISIS think we're such a joke that we're no worth bothering with because otherwise we're right royally fucked.

Putin has the right attitude. It really is time to stop pissing about, get real and actually do something...!

Monday, 23 November 2015

Is Cameron really a Time Lord ?

Proof has emerged that The Doctor is alive and well and living amongst us.

These dramatic pictures were taken behind doors in Downing Street as the 83rd Doctor, Tony Blair, regenerated into David Cameron.

This explains why these two men's thinking is so alien to most of the population.

Of course, you might doubt this unassailable evidence as the two men have been seen side by side by the public in the past, but let's not forget that the Tardis - stored safely away in the Number 10 basement - is a time travelling machine so it's quite possible for a Time Lord to be in two places at the same time.

Speculation is now mounting as to whether Iain Duncan-Smith is just another alien regeneration and whether Jeremy Corbyn is really The Master...

Saturday, 21 November 2015

Cam Force One

Clearly in the wake of the Paris attacks, now is a good time to bury bad news. Where did I hear that before?...

The government is going to spend £10 million of taxpayers' money on refurbishing an RAF Voyager aircraft for use by the Prime Minister, his cronies, and the Royal Family. About the only good thing I can think to say about that is that at least it's less than the £100 million Blair wanted to spend on his.

Apparently this is a 'cost saving' because it will save £775,000 a year on the current cost of chartering aircraft for official visits. Now I'm a simply soul, but in my book moving money out of the 'expenses' side of your accounts into the 'capital expenditure' side still means you've got less money than you started with.

Also being simple, the maths says that if you divide the 'investment' by the 'savings' it still takes about 14 years to break even, doesn't it?

Government officials insist that Mr Cameron’s version will not contain showers or a bar, so that's OK then.

There is no way this expenditure can be justified when it is clearly more cost effective to keep the current system. I could however suggest that the current system could be scaled back if their requirements were a little bit more "we're all in it together" and a little less "fuck you because I'm alright Jack"...